how should i start this post... hmm.. couldn't get to sleep cause I've been thinking so much about whatever that just took place today.. woo..
the bad/sad/negative side of things today...
1. Hmm.. had to go and run despite my cold and cough... shit man..
2. It bums me just thinking that everyone got like top 3 today and i never get anything :(
3. Did badly for 400m
then there's the brighter/better/positive side...
1. At least i managed to qualify into the finals for 200m and got 5th! (yay?)
2. ermm.. the track team did well!
3.Survived 3 races today
i guess the main reason i couldn't sleep today was because today's events kept running over my head again and again.. i feel so stress seeing the others improve while i'm moving at the speed of 5m/sec.. damn it.. i just don't know what the hell is wrong with me.. arh!! tomorrow will be our 4x100m.. hopefully things don't get screwed up.. fingers crossed.. sigh...
400m was a mess, 200m was satisfying to a certain extent i guess.. but still.. o man.. how can i put this.. i want to sleep tonight!! i just feel so 'emo-ish'.. kinda like you feel that you need someone to pour out to yet there's not really anyone there.. then there's that feelin like you'll just exploud and cry, scream or something if this continues.. i've became really thin ever since i started putting my heart into training from 3 weeks ago.. mum's worried because i've got a weak body system but i simply told her that she's over reacting.. did i lied ??
went to bukit panjang plaza with kubo for dinner!
then went to Bukit timah market to meet my family and aunties family and all.. so yup.. bought Jeax ( pri 3 cousin) to the toilet then walked home with him and auntie while the others took the car.. haiz.. talked bout entry to uni.. i'm gonna die just thinking so much now.. shit man.. arh !! she related to me an incident that took place before i met them.. at bukit timah market.. 2 stall owners were like in a super heated argument.. and then one guy closed his shop and left then came back with his son and quarreled more.. then the son made a really loud remark : " Close your shop at nine then come downstairs and fight la!".. i guess it's suppose to be slightly funny because of the akward position my family were seated at (smack middle of the rubbish).. so ya.. didn't know such childish acts can still be found it grown adults..
Tally of medals today:
Shali-1 gold (400m), 1 Bronze(200m)
Hilmi- 1 gold (200m)
Mel- 1 silver (200m)
Jon- 1 Bronze (Long Jump)
thinking back how the hell did i ever get to where i am today.. never even bothered thinking about aiming for top 3 but things have seem to change since I entered MI.. this society (real world) is god damn competitive.. need to cure my sickness fast or i'm gonna become the asshole shit man.. I HAVE TO STEP UP MY GAME!! (and get back to sleep)...